Campaign finance

Ok I think it has become common to laud Bernie Sanders as the champion of campaign finance reform. This is true insofar as he has been yelling “Citizens United” and “billionaires” a lot recently, but the idea that Bernie is the savior and the Democrats want to promote the evil superPACs is blatantly absurd.

The instant the Citizens United v. FEC ruling came down, Democrats were instantly outraged and vowed to fix it. The problem is that it is no longer a legislative issue.

This is because Congress already tried to fix things with the McCain-Feingold Act of 2002 which was explicitly designed to decrease the role of soft money and prevent corporate sponsored campaign ads from appearing close to a primary or election (no that’s not redundant, primaries and elections are different things).

But then the “conservative non-profit group” (read: right-wing propaganda factory) known as Citizens United didn’t think this was fair. They believed their money was speech and managed to convince the supreme court that parts of McCain-Feingold were against the first amendment. In particular, they thought it was unfair that they weren’t allowed to air an ad called Hillary: The Movie within 30 days of the 2008 Democratic Primaries. This was of course the same nonsense slander the GOP has been perpetrating against Secretary Clinton since she entered the national conversation in 1992. Let’s back up a second. Citizens United wanted to attack Hillary Rodham Clinton and now Bernie Sanders is bludgeoning Hillary over the head with it. With the court case that was all about the right to ruthlessly attack her. Hillary was THE INTENDED VICTIM of the Citizens United decision.

Oh look it’s a white guy victim blaming. How very new and different.

My Esteemed Governor

Somehow through willpower, brown-nosing, and selling out his beliefs, my state’s governor has remained active on the national stage by hitching his gigantic wagon to Trump’s gold plated horse.

I am referring of course to Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey.

Many, including myself, were surprised that he endorsed Trump so early, since he was one of Trump’s many many many detractors. But Christie is also very politically savvy and losing a primary isn’t going to stop his national aspirations (especially since he is term limited and is going to need a new job as of Jan. 2018). However, I think there is more here than that. Christie managed to mellow out his persona for the primary, and this was particularly easy standing next to the Donald. Without the contrast of DT and the backdrop of insanity that was the GOP Primary, the world would have seen Chris for who he truly is: a self-interested bully steeped in scandal. Here are some highlights I remember being a citizen of the Garden State.

There was that time he shouted at a Navy Seal and called him an idiot. This was in the context of trying to merge Rutgers-Camden with Rowan University. Unless you are from NJ, you have probably only heard of one of those, which is why students and administrators at Rutgers-Camden opposed this idea. But I digress, apart from the fact that Navy Seals are some of the most rigorously trained members of our armed forces and take missions with the greatest risk to themselves, this was in 2012, just shortly after a team of Navy Seals had killed one of the most evil people in the world. So people were particularly reverent to them.

This is one of the worst incidents of Chistie yelling at someone, but there are many, many more. If you want more, check out videos on this Youtube channel of Christie yelling at people. He’s a class act.

He also once took an NJ state police helicopter to his son’s baseball game. Ok, so he paid the state back. Well, kinda. (notice that the second article also mentions his low job approval ratings in 2012. so how did he get re-elected in 2013? read on)

So bully cred solidified. Absolute bully. But what about scandal. Well there was that thing with hurricane Sandy ads….doesn’t that video make you feel all warm and fuzzy and proud inside. The New Jersey shore is so strong and resilient and aren’t we great? Also look there’s the governor. Huh, I guess he was pretty good on Sandy, I’ll vote for him. Yeah so these ads came out in 2013, which is in the obnoxious off-year-of-the-off-year system, an election year for Christie. That ad was not paid for by his campaign, it was paid for by the state of New Jersey to promote tourism. Oh and a lower quote was given by another firm, but it wouldn’t have “[given] Christie more exposure during a gubernatorial election year, and…introduced him to voters in other states in advance of a possible 2016 presidential campaign.” A campaign which definitely happened. Hmm.

Ok but that’s just misuse of taxpayer dollars and emergency relief funds to the tune of $2 million. And capitalized on a natural disaster in order to assure re-election. It’s bad, but it’s not that bad right?

Ok so bridge-gate. Everyone remember this, the scandal that literally has a wikipedia page? If you say “well it’s just a few lanes on a bridge and a little traffic, what’s the big deal?” you clearly have never tried to drive to New York. Unless you live or work in Los Angeles or Chicago, you can’t even begin to understand the traffic in New York. Even if you do, you only begin to understand. The George Washington bridge is one of two ways to get to New York from NJ by car and thousands of people depend on it every day to get to work. Closing a few lanes can (and did) cause hours-long delays getting into the city. How does your boss feel about extreme lateness? probably a fan right? (Of course, this matters very little to the Governor, who can just call his helicopter when he needs to get into the city.) Not to mention the fact that it was believed to be retaliatory (a mayor refused to endorse him) and a large conspiracy. AND it’s ongoing. There exists a list of un-indicted co-conspirators that media outlets in NJ are trying to acquire, with great difficulty. Honestly this sort of retaliation feels a bit like NJ politics as usual (which is NOT A GOOD THING).

So turns out Chris and the Donald have some things in common: they are opportunistic scumbag bullies who think only about themselves and getting ahead. They are brash, mean, and dirty. Kindred spirits.